Dear Pastor Andy,
I try really hard to live a Christian life for God, but I’m in an environment with a lot of negativity. I just moved here from the East Coast to go to school because I felt like it was where God was leading me, but now I’m beginning to look at it as a test or opportunity for spiritual growth. How far should I allow my values and boundaries to be crossed before walking away? I mean, sometimes I wonder if sticking around is worth it anymore! I’ve been praying and talking about it, and there is the positive that I have a roof over my head, food on the table, and that I’m going to school. But the negative side of it is that I live in a rooming house and it’s full of drama – so I’m wondering if it’s worth it to stay. Have you ever been in an environment where it was hard on your faith, but you persevered? Please help…
You’re preachin’ to the choir, my friend. It’s tough living a Christian life for God when you’re surrounded with negativity. In fact, a huge percentage (CBN says 70%) of teens who grew up strong for Jesus in high school often fall away from Him once they get to college, due to much of the negativity, but also the new environment, new cultures, new ways of thinking, new challenges, being away from home, etc. But like Paul said in 1 Corinthians 10:13, ‘nothing you’re going through is uncommon to others. But God is faithful and won’t allow you to be tempted beyond your ability. And He’ll show you the way out so that you may endure it.’ Unfortunately though, many your age fall victim to the temptations of college and life after high school graduation.
The Lord To Send Christian Friends To Your Area?
Have you prayed for the Lord to send Christian friends to your area? One person can’t be an army against a whole battalion – you need others to help you stay focused, pick you up when you fall (and for whom you may do the same), people with whom you can pray, opportunities for Bible studies (iron sharpening iron), etc.
Most campus’ have Christian ministries (InterVarsity, Wesley Foundation, Baptists, Alpha Xi). Check around for them. You might also want to try posting on the school network for other Christians who would like to gather weekly for prayer, Bible Study, and other means of fellowship.
A Possible Mission Field
I understand the desire to leave, but before you do, but one thing that comes to mind is that if God sent you there, then He must have had a reason to, right? I mean, what sort of mission field would you expect Him to send you to? Just as Jesus said that doctors don’t treat healthy people, missionaries also don’t go to places where everything’s going great – they go to places where there’s lots of “drama” and spiritually-sick people. And brother, you’re the right age to engage with such people, you live among them and with them, you go to school with them, you see them in the halls, you eat with them, etc. — you’re in the trenches – on the front line! But before you get more freaked out by that, remember too, you can also influence them. For instance:
- If they share their “drama” with you, take time to listen to what they’re saying.
- If they ask you for advice, share with them what you’d do, and share a story about when you had to deal with something similar.
- Tell them you’ll pray for them, and/or offer to pray for them there.
- Invite them to a Bible study, or one of the campus ministries (once you find one to attend).
- Challenge them to think differently, or to approach their “drama” differently
Rick Warren, “The Purpose Driven Church”
In Rick Warren’s book, “The Purpose Driven Church“, he mentioned that while in college, he dealt with the same drama you deal with. So one day, he decided to post an invitation on the dorm building’s bulletin board for anybody who wanted to stop by on a particular night, and talk about such drama in response to what the Bible says. He said it started off slowly, but then began to take off. He’d start the group off with prayer. He’d then ask for questions, people would ask, and he’d find places in the Bible where it talks about such, and how the Bible talks about dealing with such. If you did such, if you don’t know enough of the Bible, you could no doubt use some Bible software or website to help search for such topics. Also, if you don’t know the answer, tell them straight out that you don’t know the answer, but would be willing to pray and search for the answer during the week, and get back to him the next week when you all meet. That would give him/her reason to return next week, and also reason for them to respect you because you’re taking time to help them and to follow through. And they may or may not show up the next week, but you’ll still have an answer regardless, and know how to answer it next time it’s asked by somebody.
You ARE the Light of the World
Brother, the darker it is there, the brighter you should stand out, but as one that they’ll feel comfortable approaching. This is your opportunity to share God with people who would never go anywhere near a church, and if they would, their hearts and minds would be closed off to God’s Word, anyway. But you have sort of a backdoor into their hearts and minds. Do you see what I’m saying? You’re on the front line! If you leave, you’ve just given Satan ground there, because the only threat (you), retreated. Do you get what I’m saying? You’re there for a reason, and probably many reasons – to strengthen you spiritually? Yeah, definitely. To bring light to the darkness there? Yeah, definitely. To challenge you? Yep. But also to make connections, learn to live for God in the real world, to stick to your boundaries and values in challenging times.
Pray
Pray for Christian fellowship. Pray for help. Pray for people to talk with. Pray for Christian friends. Pray for non-Christian friends, too. Pray for direction and that you’ll find a local Christian ministry to attend, learn through, grow, and strengthen you. And if the Lord sent you there, as you fully believed at first that He had, then He’s also provided resources to help you out while there, so you’re not alone. But you need to remember that in this battleground, you can’t allow yourself to be alone, either.
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